Who doesn’t love to get that little blue box from that you know who jewelry store? Perhaps that’s how this whole wedding thing got started! He gave you the little blue box, and inside was the most perfect engagement ring you could imagine. How could you not want that gorgeous blue to set the tone for your wedding?
In planning your summer wedding, whether or not you choose a beach theme, the world really is your oyster!
With the beautiful colors of summer and the availability of a wide variety of flowers,
you can have your pick of just about anything your heart desires.
Summer themes can incorporate the garden, the seashore, the tropics –
or even a harvest theme can be built around the ease of acquiring fresh fruits and vegetables.
So you’ve finally met the cowboy of your dreams and you envision a western
fairytale wedding with the two of you riding off together into the sunset when it’s all said and done.
What a perfect way to start off your life together!
Lady Luck was on your side when you met, and now you want to roll the dice
and try your luck at a Las Vegas themed wedding!
Recreating the glitz and glamour of a Vegas style wedding is as easy as finding an
Elvis impersonator in a Vegas wedding chapel.
Steeped in romance, tradition and splendor, the Victorian era has been captured in literature, television programs, and movies. Now you would like to transform your wedding dreams into a Victorian fantasy, and there are many ways to bring that bygone era to life for your special day.
A great number of Victorian newlyweds celebrated their vows with garden receptions, so the months of June and September often afforded the Victorian brides perfect weather for such an event. In the early part of the Victorian period, weddings were legally required to be held in the morning, so the most common type of reception would be a breakfast held in the garden of the bride’s home. These ideas to use as the starting point for planning your own Victorian wedding.
Emediawire (press release), WA - May 1, 2008
Bride.com.au also features articles on all aspects of wedding planning from wedding music to budgeting and fun honeymoon stories, as well as great ...
Ha'aretz, Israel - Apr 29, 2008
They did not manage to hold the wedding before being sent by train to Auschwitz on March 12, 1943, where they died a short time later. ...
Are your fiancés friends planning a bachelor party with strippers included? Not too happy about it? Here are some points that may help ease your mind.
If you know he is going to a strip club, you should already feel comforted that your fiancé was honest with you. He told you because he wants to let you know he has nothing to hide and you have nothing to worry about!
After the fact
If you find out about the stripper after the party, hear his side of the story before you jump to conclusions. Maybe his friends 'forced' him to go without his prior knowledge. As we all know, peer pressure can be very easy to cave in to.
Let's say he planned on going all along, but didn't tell you. Before you get angry, find out why he didn't tell you. Maybe he thought you would be hurt, so he kept it from you. Remember, guys think and communicate differently. But, now is the time get out your communication kinks! Speak with him about your concerns and let him explain his point of view.
What is the novelty?
Are you wondering why your fiancé is even interested in going? Aren't you good enough? Why would he want to see a bunch of naked women dancing around? Why do his friends want to buy him a lap dance?
Why is he interested in going? He wants to have a fun time with his buddies and a strip club is labeled as the typical place for a bachelor party. He is going there to bond with his buddies.
Aren't you good enough? Of course! That's why he is marrying YOU!
Why does he need a lap dance? Strippers are there to make a lot of money, not check out the men. Lap dances cost extra money, which strippers want. Your fiancés friends want to embarrass him, so, they buy a lap dance.
If you are really curious, go check out a strip club and see what the fuss is all about. A strip club is probably not what you would imagine. In my experience, going to a strip club has actually calmed my worries of my fiancé doing anything I would object to. And, your perception that only big-cheated, beautiful girls are strippers, will quickly diminish.
Are your concerns valid?
Only you and your fiancé can decide the boundaries of your relationship and what you are comfortable with. Most of all, people can�t help the way they feel. But, if you need to rationalize your concerns, here is my perspective. Many view lap dances, and strip clubs in general, as something in which their fiancé experiences some level of intimacy with another, therefore considers it cheating. However, club settings are public places and lap dances are not intimate. Your fiancé is not even allowed to touch the woman, and besides, he is too busy turning red while his friends laugh at him.
Be concerned when-
His friends hire a stripper to come to someones home or hotel to dance for them. There are no bouncers and strip club rules, which means anything can happen.
He starts going to strip clubs on a regular basis. A strip club is fine for bachelor parties and the like every so often. If he is going once a week, something is wrong. It's time to communicate!
Still not comfortable?
Address your concerns. With some women it is a self-esteem issue. If that is the case, discuss it with him. He will assure you that you are the only one for him! Or, do you not want him to go because you don�t trust him? Trust is a bigger issue that goes beyond strip clubs. If you are afraid he is going to cheat, it is time to reveal your suspicions and possibly seek counseling to rebuild the trust in your relationship.
Plan your bachelorette party the same night as his party. You will be too busy having your own fun to worry about what he is doing!
Most importantly, communicate your feelings to your fiancé. Make an agreement and stick to it. If you do that, you can both enjoy your bachelor bachelorette parties, and share your crazy and embarrassing stories!
The "First Dance" Negotiations
Just as a committed couple's first turn on the dance floor doesn't really happen at the wedding reception; their relationship doesn't really begin at the wedding. A couple does a lot of negotiating about the patterns and rules of their emerging partnership long before the day of the wedding. The wedding really doesn't make the partnership. That creative work begins at the "continental divide" in their relationship when a couple agrees to leave courtship behind and full commitment opens the door to a future together.
Courtship has its own set of rules. There's even a book outlining courtship rules. But full commitment brings the necessity for a new set of rules. For example, you may find it increasingly important to let your partner know exactly what you really think and feel. (Before your mutual commitment, it was appropriate and acceptable to keep some things to yourself.) The relationship's new level of emotional closeness may demand changes in the way you communicate and what you need to talk about.
As fully-invested partners in the life you now share, it gets harder to let misunderstandings slide. You may fight more, rather than less, as joint decision-making becomes more appropriate and necessary. Old family scripts about what partners "should" do and how they "should" treat each other may emerge in a fully committed relationship although they never surfaced during dating and courtship.
At that pivotal, creative moment in your relationship, you face each other as if the music was about to start for your first dance together. You've never really "danced" with this person before, in the context of the full commitment you now have. How will the two of you really put it all together, now that courtship has been replaced by a present and future partnership?
Who will lead and who will follow in this situation or that circumstance? How will you make decisions together, now that there are real-life decisions to be made?
What will your emotional rhythms be like; and can the two of you dance through them together? Will your partner take your strengths and weaknesses into account as you create your "dance" patterns, and are you willing to do the same? Will you capitalize on your strengths or be frustrated with each other about your "rough spots"?
By the time the wedding day arrives, the two of you will have worked out & perhaps without realizing it & many of the rules you will follow and patterns you will replay in your second and five-hundredth partnership "dance" together. The "first dance" decisions you make consciously or unconsciously will set the pattern of your partnership for years!
It's easy to be distracted by the looming reality of the wedding day on the horizon. But the first dance negotiations about your relationship will proceed unconsciously if you don't pay attention to the process. If you are currently engaged, or in the first few years of your marriage, important decisions about your relationship's unique "dance pattern" may have been made while you are (or were) distracted by the looming reality of The Wedding. In the chapters that follow I will outline segments of the "first dance" negotiations couples do which are especially important.
Anything that involves imperfect human beings is usually far from perfect. The relationship the two of you create will be a mixture of nourishment and challenge, hard work and delight. That's not a problem. It is important, however, to take a conscious look at the patterns you are setting in place. You can't change anything until you know what is. Until you take a good look at your first dance, your relationship may be on a kind of automatic pilot.
Reviewing issues couples encounter in their "first dance" may help you notice patterns of your relationship dance that need renegotiation:
- how you handle the fact of difference;
- the relationship of talk and intimacy;
- sex and touching;
- emotional communication, especially those uncomfortable feelings of anger and jealousy; - issues you bring to your relationship from your family of origin and
- expectations you have of your partner to change, now that you are in a mutually committed relationship.
The goal is to make the relationship better! It doesn't get better by keeping the sore spots hidden from yourself and/or your partner. Get it out on the table in the context of love and concern! Name it! It's the first step to relationship growth.
The dance-like patterns of a good relationship are the result of intention and practice. If you and your partner are committed to being a great "dance" team, use your first dance as a resource to discover what you need to work on the most.
- Discuss and replay different aspects of your "dance," & your patterns of relationship & realizing you can't read each other's minds.
- Offer each other constructive criticism and coaching.
- Practice some more.
- Observe how others "dance" their relationship and, although your dance will be uniquely your own, learn from studying other "dancing" couples.
- And practice.
- Realize that neither of you will become a perfect "dance" partner. You will continue to be two human beings who make mistakes sometimes, even in the context of good intentions and lots of practice.
Think of Romance as a Way of Experiencing Life
Written by David E. Sanford
If you think of "romance" with your partner as a special time in your life, it's probably long gone. On the other hand, if "romance" means an attitude and a way of approaching experience, you can bring it back to the relationship no matter how long you have known each other.
Romance with a new partner is a gift from life, demanding nothing from you but acceptance. Romance with a familiar partner must be deliberately cultivated, however. A certain mind-set is required. It has the following five elements:
1. A willingness actively to promote romance. A passive, "dreaming of romance" attitude won't do. You must create the conditions that make romance possible. The work includes making sure that the relationship does not succumb to boredom and habit and that the mundane and trivial do not dominate your contact. The work also includes being openly appreciative of each other and managing conflict in such a way that each of you sees the other as someone with whom you'd like to experience romance.
2. A desire to experience your partner anew. Because romance is discovery and delight in fresh experience, you can't have romance with someone about whom you think, I know this person 100 per cent. No matter how "old shoe" your partner may be to you, cultivate discovery, if romance is your intention. Regard your partner as a changing person, someone about whom you must reach no final conclusions, nor entertain any unquestioned assumptions. Instead, adopt an attitude that says, I am willing to learn about you and from you. I am willing for you to be my new experience. Asking your partner new questions will help. Imagine that you are meeting this person for the first time. Ask the questions that will reveal him or her in the most interesting light possible. (E.g., "When you were a child, what big questions did you have about life and your world? Which ones do you have now?")
3. A willingness to give. The romantic attitude is generous. It notices generously. It compliments and celebrates. It is the attitude of the lover who touches and makes love with words of praise and appreciation. To encourage romance, make your partner feel special. Then pursue pleasure together, romance being a matter of enjoyment first and foremost. To regain the romantic sense of yourselves as lovers, focus on the pleasure bond between you. Deliberately give each other pleasure - not expensive gifts or elaborate vacations, but the small, day-to-day gifts of sharing and simple generosity that cost little and please much.
4. An attraction to the moment and a delight in the senses. Romance is what we experience in this moment. Someone who is driven, task-consumed, always in the future and never in the present has no moments and, thus, no romance. Romance is about a look in the eyes, about the touch of skin, about the smell of hair just washed, about a soft breeze and a full moon. It's about the body, the senses and standing still and allowing yourself to be moved. Romance takes time and attention. Stop. Be still. Get out of your head. Go to your body and your senses. Allow experience. These are the directions that point to romance.
5. A willingness to feel. Romance can't exist without feeling. Cold, calculated seduction that masks as romance can, but romance itself is the expression of feeling. To be romantic is to surrender to the moment and to the feelings of that moment. To be romantic is to allow spontaneity. People who choke off their feelings (e.g., through excessive rationality) or who deaden their feelings (e.g., through alcohol, drugs or overeating) can't experience romance not while they are in flight from their feelings. Together, these five elements make up the romantic mind-set. When cultivated, they promote a romantic orientation to experience and make possible new romance with the "old" partner. They can be learned, even by harried, overworked couples. Required is a willingness to make developing the romantic attitude a priority, setting aside the time, focusing your attention and realizing that learning how to approach experience romantically, as a lover, is an accomplishment well worth the effort to achieve it.
He’s finally popped the question and of course you said yes. Now the work starts. Your wedding plans must begin right away.Have Splendid Dreams about Wedding Themes your personal idea makerOahu beach weddings